A Utrek defector who fled to the Dinos some months ago is reported to have told the Dinos that the Utrek are developing a new kind of weapon for which there is no known defence! The weapon has been called a sub-atomic disruptor by the Dinos and the beam rips apart the atoms of anything it meets at a sub-atomic weapon. This includes the atoms that make up shielding. The weapon will be the primary armament on the new Reptoli Tuul cruiser and be retro-fitted to late-model Molentic Tuul it is thought.
A further worrying aspect of this is that Dino and DDS intellignce officers think the Utrek are planning a mass attack on the Central Powers in 2 years. They cite the fact that in around 22 months the first squadron of Reptoli Tuul will be in service and also spies have obtained Utrek scheduled maintenance lists for it's fleet. The Utrek are due to perform all needed heavy maintenance over the next year and should have over 90% of it's 1100+ strong fleet available in around 20-22 months time. Its thought the Utrek might field an invading force of around 500 ships, spearheaded by the Reptoli Tuul and an estimated 30-40 Molentic Tuul equipped with the new weapon.
31.10.06
30.10.06
Character of the week : The Shiner
When The Shiner became the DDS Commander in 2094 no one suspected he would become the most successful and longest-lasting DDS Commander in history! Indeed he lasted until 2103 when he was deposed by Lord Rotarios's supporters. Under The Shiner's rule the DDS managed to end the war against the HCS, defeat The Tarbotians and Utrek and assemble a large and powerful fleet. The key to The Shiner's rule, however, was Windscorpion. He functioned as the DDS Protector, taking the lead in combat operations and strategy whilst The Shiner handled everything else. When Windy was killed The Shiner's DDS nearly collapsed, Windy was resurrected in time before final defeat and was stabilised but the damage was probably done then.
After he was deposed (officially he resigned but only after extreme pressure by the Hoods) he became the Financial Officer of the DDS and quietly gets on with his business. The Shiner is a craven coward of course, an insecure little man who surrounds himself with yes-men and is little respected by heroes like Windy. But The Shiner is good at his job and his reign should not derided.
After he was deposed (officially he resigned but only after extreme pressure by the Hoods) he became the Financial Officer of the DDS and quietly gets on with his business. The Shiner is a craven coward of course, an insecure little man who surrounds himself with yes-men and is little respected by heroes like Windy. But The Shiner is good at his job and his reign should not derided.
27.10.06
The Friar coming under pressure from other Triumvirs
The death of Colonel Volinsoy, pushed off a hotel balcony in the city of Celona in Eastern Ailier by SOT terrorists may seem just one of dozens of attacks by SOT but this has put The Friar under massive pressure from his fellow Triumvirs as Volinsoy was Captain Clone's half-brother. Captain Clone is said to have travelled immediately to Cloneworld once news broke of the death last week and after attending Volinsoy's funeral he headed for The Friar's palace where he furiously told The Friar to end the SOT attacks or face the consequences.
Those consequences are quite obvious. Within hours of Captain Clone departing Cloneworld back to his HQ on Aquaworld the powerful 3rd Space Fleet moved from it's usual location near Sandworld to a position in the Epsilon Eridani system, that system containing Cloneworld of course. The 1st and 7th Legions, the best units in Captain Clone's HCS have also been mobilised and put on short-notice for embarking aboard assault transports.
Benito Clone has also put the pressure on The Friar, saying that the SOT must be crushed by the end of the year or he and Captain Clone would hold talks on The Friar's replacement...
Those consequences are quite obvious. Within hours of Captain Clone departing Cloneworld back to his HQ on Aquaworld the powerful 3rd Space Fleet moved from it's usual location near Sandworld to a position in the Epsilon Eridani system, that system containing Cloneworld of course. The 1st and 7th Legions, the best units in Captain Clone's HCS have also been mobilised and put on short-notice for embarking aboard assault transports.
Benito Clone has also put the pressure on The Friar, saying that the SOT must be crushed by the end of the year or he and Captain Clone would hold talks on The Friar's replacement...
26.10.06
DDS shipbuilding at breaking point
A senior DDS Fleet officer has warned that the DDS' shipbuilding resources are at breaking point with production capacity at a maximum and staffing proving a problem, due to the high demand.
The DDS produces ships at large production rigs in three locations : Solaris Prime, Proxima 5 and 7. A rig may be bought into operation around Rathun's World in future too. Currently the DDS has :
Solaris
The DDS said they are working with Consolidated Spacecraft to try and ease the strain on DDS facilities.
The DDS produces ships at large production rigs in three locations : Solaris Prime, Proxima 5 and 7. A rig may be bought into operation around Rathun's World in future too. Currently the DDS has :
Solaris
- The former Quasar rig is now retooled for the Quasar ILU programme
- A large new rig for Panther production
- A rig for SUP production
- The former Isometric rig now producing Terran Sea
- A small rig producing Velocity
- A small rig fitting out Extender oilers from SUPs
- A large rig finishing off Pentekonter (Rome to be built from next year)
- A large rig fitting out Provider, Marconi and future SUP based classes
- The former second Isometric rig now modified for Rhombus rebuilds
- A large new rig for fitting out Intruder-Es
- A small rig for fitting out Providers from SUPs
- A small rig for minor updates, currently being used for Pulsar updates
The DDS said they are working with Consolidated Spacecraft to try and ease the strain on DDS facilities.
25.10.06
Ronald addresses Dino Elders
Ronald has addressed the Dino Elders and outlined their role in the planned republic. He said the Dino Elders would have a greater role than as present. He said as well as choosing a shortlist of potential Senators the Elders would also interview potential Consuls and advise the Senate on the suitability of the candidates. The Elders would also assign names to Dino Army brigades and bestow special awards and medals.
The Dino Elders are expected to vote on the republic within the next few weeks. Ronald is hoping to start the new year as a Consul not an Emperor.
The Dino Elders are expected to vote on the republic within the next few weeks. Ronald is hoping to start the new year as a Consul not an Emperor.
Faulty power conduit caused Extender accident
A faulty power conduit has been blamed for the explosion aboard Extender class oiler 7202 Stratotanker that caused a nuclear leak. Three crewmen died in the explosion and two more have died since of injuries and radiation poisoning. DDS Accident Investigators at Solaris have analysed the ship now at the DDS Nuclear Processing & Research Facility (DDS-NPRF) and said cracks in the conduit wall caused a power feedback across 2 circuits which resulted in the explosion.
Metallurgical analysis of the rest of the Extender fleet has revealed no cracks and the DDS think this was just a freak accident. The ship will be repaired and decontaminated and should be back in service in a few weeks. Meanwhile Pulsar cruiser 1012 Africa which had been in the middle of being refuelled when the accident happened has now had it's refuelling completed by another Extender oiler.
A DDS spokesman later said that all Extenders will receive regular scans of power conduits in refuelling areas and extra plate protection will be applied when the Extenders receive a planned minor update next year.
Metallurgical analysis of the rest of the Extender fleet has revealed no cracks and the DDS think this was just a freak accident. The ship will be repaired and decontaminated and should be back in service in a few weeks. Meanwhile Pulsar cruiser 1012 Africa which had been in the middle of being refuelled when the accident happened has now had it's refuelling completed by another Extender oiler.
A DDS spokesman later said that all Extenders will receive regular scans of power conduits in refuelling areas and extra plate protection will be applied when the Extenders receive a planned minor update next year.
UV105 : Genius Or Idiot?
Six bowel shattering stories come in the latest UV comic, available from all schoolgirl's wardrobes from next week. In Investigation Philes Megara is sent to gather information on Ronald's temporal scrambler but ends up being beheaded! In 13:40 Quarz is targetted by kidnappers and has to enter the wrestling ring to escape. In Anatomy Of A Hit we follow 2 members of Sword Of Truth as they target a HCS officer.
In Final Op - 2 Krusty and his fellow new recruits face their greatest test as a Tarbotian cruiser threatens them with death. In End Of The Empire? Ronald outlines his plans for a republic and the mysterious "Future Guy" resurrects Megara from an alternative timeline... one difference is this Megara is female but just as much a pain in the ass. Finally in Celebrity Marriage Windy defies the law of Lord Rotarios by visiting DDS GHQ!
UV105 is out now! Next month await UV106 Out Of The Closet with clenched buttocks!
In Final Op - 2 Krusty and his fellow new recruits face their greatest test as a Tarbotian cruiser threatens them with death. In End Of The Empire? Ronald outlines his plans for a republic and the mysterious "Future Guy" resurrects Megara from an alternative timeline... one difference is this Megara is female but just as much a pain in the ass. Finally in Celebrity Marriage Windy defies the law of Lord Rotarios by visiting DDS GHQ!
UV105 is out now! Next month await UV106 Out Of The Closet with clenched buttocks!
Fourth Velocity enters service plus update begins
At a ceremony at Solaris Spaceport Sea Urchin unveiled the fourth Velocity class destroyer 2204 Progress, the first of the Velocity S varient with a 905c cruise and improved equipment including the ability to carry a Z cannon. Sea Urchin said the Velocity S was the cutting edge of the fleet. He also announced that the first Velocity (2201 Velocity) would be the first ship to receive an update called S Upgrade Phase 1. By next summer the other 2 ships would also be to this standard.
This update is not the same as the newbuild S as it does not include the engine and weapon improvements. A later upgrade (perhaps at the end of 2107) called S Upgrade Phase 2 will bring the first 3 ships fully up to S standard.
This update is not the same as the newbuild S as it does not include the engine and weapon improvements. A later upgrade (perhaps at the end of 2107) called S Upgrade Phase 2 will bring the first 3 ships fully up to S standard.
24.10.06
DDS announce update for fleet communications
The DDS have announced a 140 million zark programme to upgrade all short range radio on it's fleet of ships. The radios, used for fleet communications, have a lower power output but improved direction to assist stealth operations and also improved encryption. The radios will be rolled out on Pulsars and Terran Sea ships from next month and the rest of the fleet over the next 12 months.
Senate vote for Dino republic
The Dino Senate has voted to dissolve the Empire and form a Dino republic along the lines that Ronald outlined last week. The Dino Elders will also vote on it and nothing will happen until that (although legally the republic can start now). Its expected Ronald will give the Dino Elders the power to agree shortlists for election to the Senate (currently they have no official powers after Ronald took away their power to vote for the Emperor).
Two more men will join the Senate once 2 Consuls are appointed.
Two more men will join the Senate once 2 Consuls are appointed.
23.10.06
Another setback for the SOT
Mere days after a helicopter crash killed senior members of the Sword Of Truth there has been another setback for the SOT. Using information found on the bodies in the crash HCS Military Police were able to find seven cells across Central Ailier and arrested over 20 members of SOT including an ex-RP General. Four SOT members were also killed in a gunfight and another 2 committed suicide using grenades rather than be captured.
The prisoners are now guests of the HCS and are being interrogated. Due to these detbacks SOT attacks have died down though a HCS Colonel was killed by a SOT sniper in Beyond Micom yesterday.
The prisoners are now guests of the HCS and are being interrogated. Due to these detbacks SOT attacks have died down though a HCS Colonel was killed by a SOT sniper in Beyond Micom yesterday.
Character of the week : Knobhead
Knobhead is Horsehead's deputy. Somehow he has managed to stay alive... Knobhead is a decent soldier in the DDS, cynical and cautious yet also possessing some brains but you know thats always dangerous in a soldier. He has been in the DDS for some years though he has not yet become a major talent. He remains in the background, doing a job well.
Knobhead knows a way of changing Horsehead's mind without being killed (as Horsehead usually regards anyone disagreeing with him as mutiny and administers immediate execution) which is key to his success and his survival. It may be he will be promoted to his own ship soon.
Knobhead knows a way of changing Horsehead's mind without being killed (as Horsehead usually regards anyone disagreeing with him as mutiny and administers immediate execution) which is key to his success and his survival. It may be he will be promoted to his own ship soon.
19.10.06
Analysis : The reasons behind Ronald's republic
At first glance the declaration by Ronald that the Dino Empire should become a republic seems surprising and even bizarre. However it comes as no surprise to some seasoned Dino commentators. Its been no secret that Ronald wishes to stand down from the day-to-day strain of being the Emperor. However he does not want the Dino Empire to suffer in his absense as happened the last time he stepped down and the disasterous reign of El Diablo followed by the coup of One-Horn led to war between the Dinos and DDS.
One solution was a two-Emperor system (even if it was forced on the Dinos by M-B-H's actions) but Ronald still wished to stand down and was on the verge of doing so when Co-Emperor Jimmy was nearly killed by an assassin's bullet last year. Now we have the two Consul republican system which Ronald hopes is the way he can finally retire... but leave the door open for a return.
Under this new system Ronald can stand down safe in the knowledge that even if his replacement proves to be a failure his term of office is fixed and limited so can be replaced. Ronald would also be free to run for a Consulship again at some stage (we believe there is to be a 5 year period before an ex-Consul can become one again) as we expect he would become bored with DIY and fishing after awhile.
One solution was a two-Emperor system (even if it was forced on the Dinos by M-B-H's actions) but Ronald still wished to stand down and was on the verge of doing so when Co-Emperor Jimmy was nearly killed by an assassin's bullet last year. Now we have the two Consul republican system which Ronald hopes is the way he can finally retire... but leave the door open for a return.
Under this new system Ronald can stand down safe in the knowledge that even if his replacement proves to be a failure his term of office is fixed and limited so can be replaced. Ronald would also be free to run for a Consulship again at some stage (we believe there is to be a 5 year period before an ex-Consul can become one again) as we expect he would become bored with DIY and fishing after awhile.
SOT suffer setback after crash
The Sword Of Truth terrorist group have suffered their first serious loss in their bloody war with the secular government of Cloneworld. In a departure from their recent highly successful tactic of random attacks on HCS officers around 20 senior SOT members went to attack the HCS Officer Training School in Relium. Enroute to the school in a civilian registered CH-36 helicopter the aircraft appears to have suffered some kind of mechanical fault and crashed on the slopes of Mount Gelu-Urbert with total loss of life.
One unconfirmed report says there may have been a weapons malfunction aboard the helicopter, maybe a missile or rocket prematurely firing which caused the accident. A HCS spokesman said most of the dead were ex-members of the disbanded RP Cloisters Brigade and the core of the SOT.
One unconfirmed report says there may have been a weapons malfunction aboard the helicopter, maybe a missile or rocket prematurely firing which caused the accident. A HCS spokesman said most of the dead were ex-members of the disbanded RP Cloisters Brigade and the core of the SOT.
Ronald wishes to turn the Empire into a republic
Emperor Ronald shocked members of the Senate today, it is reported, by announcing his post should be abolished! Ronald said that the Empire should become a republic with democratic representation at all levels. This is a remarkable u-turn by Ronald who up until now has largely resisted the calls for democracy at the highest level led by SS Commander Lakes.
Ronald said, "The people wish it, we should consider it." He suggests the post of Emperor be abolished and replaced by two Consuls who would serve for a year before new elections. He said that the first two Consuls should be appointed and be himself and another Senator and should spend the year before they step down setting up the democratic infrastructure for the election of their replacements.
Ronald said that one Consul should take charge of military affairs (and be the head of the army) and the other civilian. Ronald said that under the new system the Consuls would make decisions in consultation with the Senate. In fact this is much as Ronald reigns now anyway. Ronald said that future Consuls should be shortlisted by the Senate and then this list put up for election by the people. Ronald finally said that the Senate should be increased from 12 to 14 members and there be a new post of Senior Senator who would run the business of the Senate.
SS Commander Lakes, the head of the political party VERITAS = TRUTH welcomed the new system though said he would have preferred an elected President. One political commentator has said that as Ronald would probably be Senior Senator and Military Consul he would actually end up with more power than he does now as Emperor!
Ronald said, "The people wish it, we should consider it." He suggests the post of Emperor be abolished and replaced by two Consuls who would serve for a year before new elections. He said that the first two Consuls should be appointed and be himself and another Senator and should spend the year before they step down setting up the democratic infrastructure for the election of their replacements.
Ronald said that one Consul should take charge of military affairs (and be the head of the army) and the other civilian. Ronald said that under the new system the Consuls would make decisions in consultation with the Senate. In fact this is much as Ronald reigns now anyway. Ronald said that future Consuls should be shortlisted by the Senate and then this list put up for election by the people. Ronald finally said that the Senate should be increased from 12 to 14 members and there be a new post of Senior Senator who would run the business of the Senate.
SS Commander Lakes, the head of the political party VERITAS = TRUTH welcomed the new system though said he would have preferred an elected President. One political commentator has said that as Ronald would probably be Senior Senator and Military Consul he would actually end up with more power than he does now as Emperor!
18.10.06
Tarbotian cruiser destroyed by Dinos
The Dinos are reporting they have encountered and destroyed a Tarbotian Heavy Cruiser (thought to be an older Type E). Two Dinomarks on a training mission were attacked by the Tarbotians and disabled. The Tarbotians demanded the Dinos hand over radioactive material from their reactor core. The Dinos were able to restore power to their missile system and destroyed the Tarbotians with two multi-phase missiles. The Tarbotians did not have any shields.
Its thought the Tarbotians did not have main power as the material they demanded would have been needed to operate their reactor.
Its thought the Tarbotians did not have main power as the material they demanded would have been needed to operate their reactor.
16.10.06
Character of the week : G-B-H
G-B-H is Ronald's best mate and his right hand man. For a long time he was the Deputy Emperor though under the new system he is now officially Minister of Foreign Affairs though he is still second only to The Ron. The ironic thing is, when G-B-H has had to step in when Ronald has been absent hes been largely a failure who freezes when in charge...
Ronald and G-B-H met when Ronald was a centurion and G-B-H a decurion. At first they hated each other as G-B-H thought Ronald was a fancy dan officer just there to grab some glory. During an operation against terrorists Ronald saved G-B-H's life and since then they have been best friends. G-B-H has been at Ronald's side ever since.
In recent years the friendship came under some strain because of the evil M-B-H, G-B-H's son, who spent much of the time trying to kill Ronald. Recently its become even tighter after G-B-H's daughter Pheldira has married Ronald's son Smellyson. Its thought that the Iguana-Golas could rule the empire for centuries. We'll have to see.
G-B-H is known as one of the strongest Dinos in the army, a fighter of immense talent and courage. G-B-H might freeze when Emperor but he leads well at a lower level. He is one of the all-time greats, no doubt about it.
Ronald and G-B-H met when Ronald was a centurion and G-B-H a decurion. At first they hated each other as G-B-H thought Ronald was a fancy dan officer just there to grab some glory. During an operation against terrorists Ronald saved G-B-H's life and since then they have been best friends. G-B-H has been at Ronald's side ever since.
In recent years the friendship came under some strain because of the evil M-B-H, G-B-H's son, who spent much of the time trying to kill Ronald. Recently its become even tighter after G-B-H's daughter Pheldira has married Ronald's son Smellyson. Its thought that the Iguana-Golas could rule the empire for centuries. We'll have to see.
G-B-H is known as one of the strongest Dinos in the army, a fighter of immense talent and courage. G-B-H might freeze when Emperor but he leads well at a lower level. He is one of the all-time greats, no doubt about it.
13.10.06
Windscorpion on Desert Island Discs!
Windscorpion was the guest this week on the long-running show Desert Island Discs, in it he chose songs by the Pet Shop Boys, Erasure, Frankie and Sexus. Basically all gay pop. His chosen book was the Bumper Book Of Violent Gay Porn. He said he created this book himself from his massive collection of porn magazines. Windy said that W's Style was running wild across the DDS and young men were flocking to his bed. When questioned on this he said he meant "cause".
The Friar facing revolt?
There are unconfirmed reports of senior HCS officers openly criticising The Friar's leadership in the face of the terrorism threat of the Sword Of Truth. A blog aligned to the SOT is claiming Field Marshal Holman, the head of all HCS forces in the Ailier South district is calling on the Friar to resign and for Captain Clone to take over operations on Cloneworld. Some other senior officers are echoing these comments including General Lund of the 20th Panzer division who said that the SOT were being allowed to run riot due to "weakness at the top".
Meanwhile the SOT's latest wave of attacks on random HCS officers shows no signs of slowing down. Five officers were killed yesterday including a General, the first. General Alupatri, the aide to Field Marshal Imega (head of HCS in Micom North), was gunned down by a SOT terrorist posing as a gas meter reader.
Meanwhile the SOT's latest wave of attacks on random HCS officers shows no signs of slowing down. Five officers were killed yesterday including a General, the first. General Alupatri, the aide to Field Marshal Imega (head of HCS in Micom North), was gunned down by a SOT terrorist posing as a gas meter reader.
12.10.06
Accident during refuelling of Pulsar cruiser
The DDS are reporting that three crewmen died of radiation poisoning and seven more were badly hurt during an accident last week on the oiler 7202 Stratotanker when it was handling spent fuel and nuclear byproducts whilst refuelling Pulsar cruiser 1012 Africa near Saeou. An explosion aboard the Extender oiler caused the release of contaminated material. The explosion is thought to have been caused by an electrical fault. All other Extenders have been removed from service and are currently being checked for defects in their electrical systems which should take about a week.
The area were the leak took place has been sealed and 7202 Stratotanker is now travelling to the DDS Nuclear Processing & Research Facility (DDS-NPRF) at Solaris for decontamination. The Pulsar cruiser was unable to complete it's refuelling and is now waiting for another oiler to complete it.
The area were the leak took place has been sealed and 7202 Stratotanker is now travelling to the DDS Nuclear Processing & Research Facility (DDS-NPRF) at Solaris for decontamination. The Pulsar cruiser was unable to complete it's refuelling and is now waiting for another oiler to complete it.
Windscorpion pensive on news that XE is alive
Several years ago Ayatollah Clone XE captured and executed Windscorpion's boyfriend Ralphie live on TV (pay-per-view). Windscorpion responded with deadly revenge, the cream of the DDS desended on RP HQ and slew XE and the cream of the RP. Or did they...
Ayatollah Akiwati was named the new spiritual leader and although there were definate similarities between him and XE Windscorpion decided to not investigate further. Now with the resurrection of XE as the head of the Sword Of Truth it appears Akiwati was XE!
So how does that make Windscorpion feel. He told Metrosexual & Violent Buggery Weekly : "The pain of Ralphie's loss i still feel every day. I thought i had killed that fool XE and defiled his unholy corpse. Now it seems the murdering bastard is still around. I am still in a bit of shock at that, maybe i will finish the job... one day."
Ayatollah Akiwati was named the new spiritual leader and although there were definate similarities between him and XE Windscorpion decided to not investigate further. Now with the resurrection of XE as the head of the Sword Of Truth it appears Akiwati was XE!
So how does that make Windscorpion feel. He told Metrosexual & Violent Buggery Weekly : "The pain of Ralphie's loss i still feel every day. I thought i had killed that fool XE and defiled his unholy corpse. Now it seems the murdering bastard is still around. I am still in a bit of shock at that, maybe i will finish the job... one day."
SOT attacks continue
Three more HCS officers were killed yesterday in attacks across Cloneworld and one more badly injured. In one attack Colonel Slimis of the 30th Artillery Regiment was killed in his bath when a SOT intruder in his house dropped a hairdryer into the water. The wide variety of attack methods and the sheer number of possible targets is making it very difficult for the authorities to counter this wave of attacks.
"The only way would be to restrict every HCS officer to barracks, that would be tens of thousands of men. The HCS could not operate if that happened." a spokesman for HCS GHQ said.
The focus has now moved to trying to destroy SOT but that could prove very difficult. According to an unnamed HCSIntel officer the SOT "Is highly dispersed into cells of maybe two-four men with maybe only one concentration of troops around XE. Its likely that even if XE was caught or killed the other cells would continue operations."
"The only way would be to restrict every HCS officer to barracks, that would be tens of thousands of men. The HCS could not operate if that happened." a spokesman for HCS GHQ said.
The focus has now moved to trying to destroy SOT but that could prove very difficult. According to an unnamed HCSIntel officer the SOT "Is highly dispersed into cells of maybe two-four men with maybe only one concentration of troops around XE. Its likely that even if XE was caught or killed the other cells would continue operations."
11.10.06
Jimmy hopes to return to office next year
Former Emperor Jimmy, who was the victim of an assassination attempt last year, has continued his slow recovery after life saving surgery. He told a meeting of army officers he hoped to return to work in the new year, perhaps next spring. The question as what his job will be was not asked though. While Jimmy lay in a coma Ronald stripped him of the Emperorship and appointed him a member of the Senate. There are some experts on Dino Law that say that Ronald did not have the power to do that and Jimmy is still Co-Emperor.
One rumour that surfaced this summer was that Jimmy was reported to be furious with Ronald for stripping him of his crown whilst he lay in a coma. Jimmy however, when asked if he was angry at Ronald, said that before the assassination attempt they had agreed that the two Emperor system would end. Indeed Jimmy was shot at a meeting where Ronald was due to announce his retirement. Jimmy said that the Empire could not have lain in limbo without a leader especially as it was unknown how long he would be injured, or even if he would survive! One officer asked why Ronald did not simply leave Jimmy as Co-Emperor, at that Jimmy said cryptically "Ronald did what he thought was best."
One rumour that surfaced this summer was that Jimmy was reported to be furious with Ronald for stripping him of his crown whilst he lay in a coma. Jimmy however, when asked if he was angry at Ronald, said that before the assassination attempt they had agreed that the two Emperor system would end. Indeed Jimmy was shot at a meeting where Ronald was due to announce his retirement. Jimmy said that the Empire could not have lain in limbo without a leader especially as it was unknown how long he would be injured, or even if he would survive! One officer asked why Ronald did not simply leave Jimmy as Co-Emperor, at that Jimmy said cryptically "Ronald did what he thought was best."
Two new ships join the fleet
The latest Terran Sea frigate 3215 Arabian Sea has joined the fleet. The ship, a Terran Sea Block 2, includes a new sensor array and some control elements planned for the Block 3 which is due from 3218 onwards. Arabian Sea will test out this technology for the Block 3 which will appear next year.
The latest Extender class oiler 7206 Globemaster has also entered service.
The latest Extender class oiler 7206 Globemaster has also entered service.
New wave of attacks by SOT
Colonel Ximan Belmont of the HCS was waiting for his train at the provincial station of Helun in eastern Ailier as usual to go to his job at the regional HCS recruitment office yesterday morning. Only he never made it. A fellow passenger pushed Belmont onto the tracks as another train was travelling through the station, Belmont was crushed to death by the train. Later on the Sword Of Truth claimed responsibility.
It was one of seven attacks on HCS officers (two were unsuccessful) across Cloneworld that morning. Captain Elton of the 312nd Infantry Regiment was another victim. He was crossing the road from his home near the army base in Wells Fort, West Clone Republic. Suddenly a car appeared out of nowhere and mowed him down. The SOT also later claimed responsibility. A SOT source told Clone TV that all HCS officers were now targets. The HCS have told all it's personnel to take all possible precautions.
It was one of seven attacks on HCS officers (two were unsuccessful) across Cloneworld that morning. Captain Elton of the 312nd Infantry Regiment was another victim. He was crossing the road from his home near the army base in Wells Fort, West Clone Republic. Suddenly a car appeared out of nowhere and mowed him down. The SOT also later claimed responsibility. A SOT source told Clone TV that all HCS officers were now targets. The HCS have told all it's personnel to take all possible precautions.
9.10.06
Character of the week : Rubiks Cube Warrior
Rubiks Cube Warrior is a minor warrior in the DDS, a man with a strange name but not a lot else of note. He has been in the DDS for some time and is still alive so that is a sign he is not totally useless. In his early DDS days he came to the attention of Windscorpion who gave him the benefit of his... expertise. Now RC Warrior is bitter and still bears mental scars even if physical injuries have finally healed.
His hatred of Windy drives him to a psycotic rage which had led Sea Urchin to move RC Warrior to somewhere more dangerous : this being in Horsehead's team. He usually runs with Truman who is another dubious talent.
His hatred of Windy drives him to a psycotic rage which had led Sea Urchin to move RC Warrior to somewhere more dangerous : this being in Horsehead's team. He usually runs with Truman who is another dubious talent.
5.10.06
XE : "The Friar likes to have sex with another man's bottom"
The Sword Of Truth achieved a hattrick of high profile "info-attacks" when around 40 large electronic billboards across the capital of Cloneworld Ailier City were hacked and instead of their usual programme of adverts for menswear they displayed Ayatollah Clone XE who was able to give another message. He said :
"Fellow Clones, rise up and resist the secular forces! Fight back against the foul Friar! He is a deviant secular criminal! The Friar likes to have sex with another man's bottom, and then eat nut roast! Followers of Oojok eat meat! Personally I love beef! Oojok is most great! Oojok is most great!"
The Friar is understood to have had the head of network security in Ailier sacked.
"Fellow Clones, rise up and resist the secular forces! Fight back against the foul Friar! He is a deviant secular criminal! The Friar likes to have sex with another man's bottom, and then eat nut roast! Followers of Oojok eat meat! Personally I love beef! Oojok is most great! Oojok is most great!"
The Friar is understood to have had the head of network security in Ailier sacked.
4.10.06
The Friar slaps down XE / XE fights back!
Its been reported by several bloggers that there has been unrest on the streets of several cities across the Clone Empire after XE managed to broadcast live on TV thanks to hacking by SOT info-warriors. The Friar was quick to appear on TV to deride XE.
"Recently his ragtag army of fascists and social misfits has been prevented from acts of terror by the new security measures bought in by the Democratic Secular Regime. So he resorts to a comedy show on TV! I do not fear his words, i found them amusing. Maybe we can give him his own TV show. Its highly entertaining, if not very intelligent. XE is a clown and soon will be bought to justice!" said The Friar.
However mere minutes after The Friar's broadcast SOT hackers struck again. They broke into the central e-mail registry of a major ISP in Ailier and e-mailed a video message from XE to some 5 million inboxes. In the message XE said :
"Stand up and fight secularism! Fight the foul infidel with his bestial vegetarian lesbianism! Burn the infidels! Burn their secular nut roasts! Toss their foul veggieburgers into the abyss! Eat meat for Oojok! Oojok is most great! Oojok is most great!"
"Recently his ragtag army of fascists and social misfits has been prevented from acts of terror by the new security measures bought in by the Democratic Secular Regime. So he resorts to a comedy show on TV! I do not fear his words, i found them amusing. Maybe we can give him his own TV show. Its highly entertaining, if not very intelligent. XE is a clown and soon will be bought to justice!" said The Friar.
However mere minutes after The Friar's broadcast SOT hackers struck again. They broke into the central e-mail registry of a major ISP in Ailier and e-mailed a video message from XE to some 5 million inboxes. In the message XE said :
"Stand up and fight secularism! Fight the foul infidel with his bestial vegetarian lesbianism! Burn the infidels! Burn their secular nut roasts! Toss their foul veggieburgers into the abyss! Eat meat for Oojok! Oojok is most great! Oojok is most great!"
XE gives speech to Clone Empire!
Sword Of Truth hackers have managed to break into the main data stream of Clone TV and replaced existing programming with a recorded speech by Ayatollah Clone XE! This was broadcast to billions across the empire as engineers fought desperatly to cut the link. For two minutes XE spoke to the people. The effects of this massive propaganda coup have yet to be measured.
The contents of his speech :
Fellow clones, it is I : Ayatollah Clone XE. Your spiritual leader. Despite the efforts of the satanic Anti-Oojok I have not been silenced and the power of Oojok flows throughout you all. Oojok came to us many years ago and led us to victory in our darkest hour. Now infidel swine like Captain Clone have forgotton that. They must be crushed by the FIST of RIGHTHOUSNESS!
Rise up all Clones! Rise up and overthrow the secular oppressors who have led you astray, away from the utopia of worship to the misery of democracy and self-determination. Such foul bestial filth can only lead to doom. Such lies can only lead to the path of the Anti-Oojok. Soon you will be sleeping with your fellow men, an abomination fostered by the Anti-Oojok. Resist the call to wallow in filth! Resist the whips of your secular oppressors!
Stand up! Shout out loudly! Your hearts full of joy! Your soul cleansed of secular filth! Your mind full of zeal! Stand up and proclaim loudly your love of Oojok! Oojok is most great! Oojok is-
(The feed was then cut)
The contents of his speech :
Fellow clones, it is I : Ayatollah Clone XE. Your spiritual leader. Despite the efforts of the satanic Anti-Oojok I have not been silenced and the power of Oojok flows throughout you all. Oojok came to us many years ago and led us to victory in our darkest hour. Now infidel swine like Captain Clone have forgotton that. They must be crushed by the FIST of RIGHTHOUSNESS!
Rise up all Clones! Rise up and overthrow the secular oppressors who have led you astray, away from the utopia of worship to the misery of democracy and self-determination. Such foul bestial filth can only lead to doom. Such lies can only lead to the path of the Anti-Oojok. Soon you will be sleeping with your fellow men, an abomination fostered by the Anti-Oojok. Resist the call to wallow in filth! Resist the whips of your secular oppressors!
Stand up! Shout out loudly! Your hearts full of joy! Your soul cleansed of secular filth! Your mind full of zeal! Stand up and proclaim loudly your love of Oojok! Oojok is most great! Oojok is-
(The feed was then cut)
3.10.06
UV104 : FILLING THE VOID
Trash80 Media Services is proud to present the latest bowel shattering collection of DDS stories. Its Big Brother time again on Dino Land and in Dino BB : The Infamy the boys are shocked to find out Spikeson's new girlfriend is a contestant and try to work out which of the collection of freaks is his beau. In W's Style has Windy finally been broken by the New DDS message of Lord Rotarios? Following on in Girls With No Tomolo Firefly races against time to prevent the final victory of the New DDS Project.
In Final Op - 1 the recruits we have been following begin their final field training assignment and tangle with a Tarbotian warship. Finally in Strap On a Utrek assassin kills a Governor on Rathun's World and Sea Urchin gives chase. UV104 is available in all brothels and school tuck shops.
Stay tuned next month for UV105 Genius Or Idiot?
In Final Op - 1 the recruits we have been following begin their final field training assignment and tangle with a Tarbotian warship. Finally in Strap On a Utrek assassin kills a Governor on Rathun's World and Sea Urchin gives chase. UV104 is available in all brothels and school tuck shops.
Stay tuned next month for UV105 Genius Or Idiot?
2.10.06
Character of the week : Gibson
Gibson's career has had more lives than a Dino Cat, he is the great survivor of the Dino Army, even though he has had to frequently perform under extreme pressure...
Gibson rose up the ranks of the SS, mostly though being a competant administrator, and became SS Commander. However his lack of perversions and honesty put him at odds with most of the rest of the SS. Ronald chose him to be the Liaison Officer with the DDS instead. This is when his trouble began. Windscorpion gave him a long list of Dino materials wanted by the DDS but to procure these materials he had to see various Dino ministers, all obese sweaty old men. He found the price of getting these materials very high...
After months of violent buggery by fat old men Gibson was a mental wreck and tried to kill himself but Windscorpion prevented him, he found himself in the control of The Windy One. Then the Dino's relationship with the DDS broke down and Gibson escaped back to Dino Land. But then he found himself suffering from the effects of his ordeal. He tried to rejoin SS service but got a hard on whilst on parade. His reputation and mental well being were utterly shattered and he was released by the SS.
Some time later Ronald agreed for him to return to the SS but he suffered frequent jibes from other SS who didn't want to be "under him". To his horror however Windscorpion tried to use him again to gain Dino technology for the mission against the Rectoids. This time however Gibson was caught trying to give secrets and then the terrible things that had happened to Gibson all came out. Gibson found strength from the support of the Dinos and has managed to put these past torments behind him (so to speak). He was made deputy commander of the SS with a secret brief to watch for Lakes' rule breaking.
However Lakes framed Gibson as being behind the Jimmy assassination attempt. Ronald knew Gibson was framed but had no choice in releasing Gibson from the SS again. Gibson will probably return to service at some stage, its suspected he will be SS Commander once Lakes is finally got rid of.
Gibson rose up the ranks of the SS, mostly though being a competant administrator, and became SS Commander. However his lack of perversions and honesty put him at odds with most of the rest of the SS. Ronald chose him to be the Liaison Officer with the DDS instead. This is when his trouble began. Windscorpion gave him a long list of Dino materials wanted by the DDS but to procure these materials he had to see various Dino ministers, all obese sweaty old men. He found the price of getting these materials very high...
After months of violent buggery by fat old men Gibson was a mental wreck and tried to kill himself but Windscorpion prevented him, he found himself in the control of The Windy One. Then the Dino's relationship with the DDS broke down and Gibson escaped back to Dino Land. But then he found himself suffering from the effects of his ordeal. He tried to rejoin SS service but got a hard on whilst on parade. His reputation and mental well being were utterly shattered and he was released by the SS.
Some time later Ronald agreed for him to return to the SS but he suffered frequent jibes from other SS who didn't want to be "under him". To his horror however Windscorpion tried to use him again to gain Dino technology for the mission against the Rectoids. This time however Gibson was caught trying to give secrets and then the terrible things that had happened to Gibson all came out. Gibson found strength from the support of the Dinos and has managed to put these past torments behind him (so to speak). He was made deputy commander of the SS with a secret brief to watch for Lakes' rule breaking.
However Lakes framed Gibson as being behind the Jimmy assassination attempt. Ronald knew Gibson was framed but had no choice in releasing Gibson from the SS again. Gibson will probably return to service at some stage, its suspected he will be SS Commander once Lakes is finally got rid of.
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