Rubiks Cube Warrior is a minor warrior in the DDS, a man with a strange name but not a lot else of note. He has been in the DDS for some time and is still alive so that is a sign he is not totally useless. In his early DDS days he came to the attention of Windscorpion who gave him the benefit of his... expertise. Now RC Warrior is bitter and still bears mental scars even if physical injuries have finally healed.
His hatred of Windy drives him to a psycotic rage which had led Sea Urchin to move RC Warrior to somewhere more dangerous : this being in Horsehead's team. He usually runs with Truman who is another dubious talent.
5.10.06
XE : "The Friar likes to have sex with another man's bottom"
The Sword Of Truth achieved a hattrick of high profile "info-attacks" when around 40 large electronic billboards across the capital of Cloneworld Ailier City were hacked and instead of their usual programme of adverts for menswear they displayed Ayatollah Clone XE who was able to give another message. He said :
"Fellow Clones, rise up and resist the secular forces! Fight back against the foul Friar! He is a deviant secular criminal! The Friar likes to have sex with another man's bottom, and then eat nut roast! Followers of Oojok eat meat! Personally I love beef! Oojok is most great! Oojok is most great!"
The Friar is understood to have had the head of network security in Ailier sacked.
"Fellow Clones, rise up and resist the secular forces! Fight back against the foul Friar! He is a deviant secular criminal! The Friar likes to have sex with another man's bottom, and then eat nut roast! Followers of Oojok eat meat! Personally I love beef! Oojok is most great! Oojok is most great!"
The Friar is understood to have had the head of network security in Ailier sacked.
4.10.06
The Friar slaps down XE / XE fights back!
Its been reported by several bloggers that there has been unrest on the streets of several cities across the Clone Empire after XE managed to broadcast live on TV thanks to hacking by SOT info-warriors. The Friar was quick to appear on TV to deride XE.
"Recently his ragtag army of fascists and social misfits has been prevented from acts of terror by the new security measures bought in by the Democratic Secular Regime. So he resorts to a comedy show on TV! I do not fear his words, i found them amusing. Maybe we can give him his own TV show. Its highly entertaining, if not very intelligent. XE is a clown and soon will be bought to justice!" said The Friar.
However mere minutes after The Friar's broadcast SOT hackers struck again. They broke into the central e-mail registry of a major ISP in Ailier and e-mailed a video message from XE to some 5 million inboxes. In the message XE said :
"Stand up and fight secularism! Fight the foul infidel with his bestial vegetarian lesbianism! Burn the infidels! Burn their secular nut roasts! Toss their foul veggieburgers into the abyss! Eat meat for Oojok! Oojok is most great! Oojok is most great!"
"Recently his ragtag army of fascists and social misfits has been prevented from acts of terror by the new security measures bought in by the Democratic Secular Regime. So he resorts to a comedy show on TV! I do not fear his words, i found them amusing. Maybe we can give him his own TV show. Its highly entertaining, if not very intelligent. XE is a clown and soon will be bought to justice!" said The Friar.
However mere minutes after The Friar's broadcast SOT hackers struck again. They broke into the central e-mail registry of a major ISP in Ailier and e-mailed a video message from XE to some 5 million inboxes. In the message XE said :
"Stand up and fight secularism! Fight the foul infidel with his bestial vegetarian lesbianism! Burn the infidels! Burn their secular nut roasts! Toss their foul veggieburgers into the abyss! Eat meat for Oojok! Oojok is most great! Oojok is most great!"
XE gives speech to Clone Empire!
Sword Of Truth hackers have managed to break into the main data stream of Clone TV and replaced existing programming with a recorded speech by Ayatollah Clone XE! This was broadcast to billions across the empire as engineers fought desperatly to cut the link. For two minutes XE spoke to the people. The effects of this massive propaganda coup have yet to be measured.
The contents of his speech :
Fellow clones, it is I : Ayatollah Clone XE. Your spiritual leader. Despite the efforts of the satanic Anti-Oojok I have not been silenced and the power of Oojok flows throughout you all. Oojok came to us many years ago and led us to victory in our darkest hour. Now infidel swine like Captain Clone have forgotton that. They must be crushed by the FIST of RIGHTHOUSNESS!
Rise up all Clones! Rise up and overthrow the secular oppressors who have led you astray, away from the utopia of worship to the misery of democracy and self-determination. Such foul bestial filth can only lead to doom. Such lies can only lead to the path of the Anti-Oojok. Soon you will be sleeping with your fellow men, an abomination fostered by the Anti-Oojok. Resist the call to wallow in filth! Resist the whips of your secular oppressors!
Stand up! Shout out loudly! Your hearts full of joy! Your soul cleansed of secular filth! Your mind full of zeal! Stand up and proclaim loudly your love of Oojok! Oojok is most great! Oojok is-
(The feed was then cut)
The contents of his speech :
Fellow clones, it is I : Ayatollah Clone XE. Your spiritual leader. Despite the efforts of the satanic Anti-Oojok I have not been silenced and the power of Oojok flows throughout you all. Oojok came to us many years ago and led us to victory in our darkest hour. Now infidel swine like Captain Clone have forgotton that. They must be crushed by the FIST of RIGHTHOUSNESS!
Rise up all Clones! Rise up and overthrow the secular oppressors who have led you astray, away from the utopia of worship to the misery of democracy and self-determination. Such foul bestial filth can only lead to doom. Such lies can only lead to the path of the Anti-Oojok. Soon you will be sleeping with your fellow men, an abomination fostered by the Anti-Oojok. Resist the call to wallow in filth! Resist the whips of your secular oppressors!
Stand up! Shout out loudly! Your hearts full of joy! Your soul cleansed of secular filth! Your mind full of zeal! Stand up and proclaim loudly your love of Oojok! Oojok is most great! Oojok is-
(The feed was then cut)
3.10.06
UV104 : FILLING THE VOID
Trash80 Media Services is proud to present the latest bowel shattering collection of DDS stories. Its Big Brother time again on Dino Land and in Dino BB : The Infamy the boys are shocked to find out Spikeson's new girlfriend is a contestant and try to work out which of the collection of freaks is his beau. In W's Style has Windy finally been broken by the New DDS message of Lord Rotarios? Following on in Girls With No Tomolo Firefly races against time to prevent the final victory of the New DDS Project.In Final Op - 1 the recruits we have been following begin their final field training assignment and tangle with a Tarbotian warship. Finally in Strap On a Utrek assassin kills a Governor on Rathun's World and Sea Urchin gives chase. UV104 is available in all brothels and school tuck shops.
Stay tuned next month for UV105 Genius Or Idiot?
2.10.06
Character of the week : Gibson
Gibson's career has had more lives than a Dino Cat, he is the great survivor of the Dino Army, even though he has had to frequently perform under extreme pressure...
Gibson rose up the ranks of the SS, mostly though being a competant administrator, and became SS Commander. However his lack of perversions and honesty put him at odds with most of the rest of the SS. Ronald chose him to be the Liaison Officer with the DDS instead. This is when his trouble began. Windscorpion gave him a long list of Dino materials wanted by the DDS but to procure these materials he had to see various Dino ministers, all obese sweaty old men. He found the price of getting these materials very high...
After months of violent buggery by fat old men Gibson was a mental wreck and tried to kill himself but Windscorpion prevented him, he found himself in the control of The Windy One. Then the Dino's relationship with the DDS broke down and Gibson escaped back to Dino Land. But then he found himself suffering from the effects of his ordeal. He tried to rejoin SS service but got a hard on whilst on parade. His reputation and mental well being were utterly shattered and he was released by the SS.
Some time later Ronald agreed for him to return to the SS but he suffered frequent jibes from other SS who didn't want to be "under him". To his horror however Windscorpion tried to use him again to gain Dino technology for the mission against the Rectoids. This time however Gibson was caught trying to give secrets and then the terrible things that had happened to Gibson all came out. Gibson found strength from the support of the Dinos and has managed to put these past torments behind him (so to speak). He was made deputy commander of the SS with a secret brief to watch for Lakes' rule breaking.
However Lakes framed Gibson as being behind the Jimmy assassination attempt. Ronald knew Gibson was framed but had no choice in releasing Gibson from the SS again. Gibson will probably return to service at some stage, its suspected he will be SS Commander once Lakes is finally got rid of.
Gibson rose up the ranks of the SS, mostly though being a competant administrator, and became SS Commander. However his lack of perversions and honesty put him at odds with most of the rest of the SS. Ronald chose him to be the Liaison Officer with the DDS instead. This is when his trouble began. Windscorpion gave him a long list of Dino materials wanted by the DDS but to procure these materials he had to see various Dino ministers, all obese sweaty old men. He found the price of getting these materials very high...
After months of violent buggery by fat old men Gibson was a mental wreck and tried to kill himself but Windscorpion prevented him, he found himself in the control of The Windy One. Then the Dino's relationship with the DDS broke down and Gibson escaped back to Dino Land. But then he found himself suffering from the effects of his ordeal. He tried to rejoin SS service but got a hard on whilst on parade. His reputation and mental well being were utterly shattered and he was released by the SS.
Some time later Ronald agreed for him to return to the SS but he suffered frequent jibes from other SS who didn't want to be "under him". To his horror however Windscorpion tried to use him again to gain Dino technology for the mission against the Rectoids. This time however Gibson was caught trying to give secrets and then the terrible things that had happened to Gibson all came out. Gibson found strength from the support of the Dinos and has managed to put these past torments behind him (so to speak). He was made deputy commander of the SS with a secret brief to watch for Lakes' rule breaking.
However Lakes framed Gibson as being behind the Jimmy assassination attempt. Ronald knew Gibson was framed but had no choice in releasing Gibson from the SS again. Gibson will probably return to service at some stage, its suspected he will be SS Commander once Lakes is finally got rid of.
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