Windscorpion celebrates his birthday

Windscorpion, the hardcore icon of the DDS, celebrated his 38th birthday today and was presented with a Lynx gift pack by DOO Action Painting at a ceremony at DDS Terran HQ in Stoke. Windy said he has enjoyed his first extended vacation for some years now and feels it is time to reflect and look forward as the big 40 comes on.

Windy denied he was "past it" and said he could still "get it up" despite rumours to the contrary published in the Terran Star. He did not comment when asked about the rape of the reporter of the story a few nights before. "Shit happens." is all Windy said.

Quasar ILU programme begun early

In a surprise move the DDS have begun the massive Quasar Intermediate Life Update (ILU) programme early. Class flagship 1201 Quasar was decommissioned and work begun on the update which entails a partial rebuilding, re-engining, new systems and weapons. The programme was not due to start until early 2107 but 1201 Quasar was found to have some fatigue cracks to the main load bearer that meant it was restricted to 400c. As the first ship to be completed Quasar was not built quite as robustly as later ships. The DDS thus decided to begin the ILU programme now instead of having a lame duck ship.

The ship is due to be completed early next year and then the full ILU programme will begin with 3 ships at a time updated. Dr Forbidden, the top DDS boffin, said that the Quasar ILU fleet would have 100% better combat effectiveness compared to the existing class. He also said improved reliability and availability would mean the reduced fleet of 12 Quasar ILUs would have nearly the same reach as the original class of 20.

More SOT attacks cause tensions in the Triumvirate

Three more attacks across Cloneworld by the Sword Of Truth occured yesterday. In one incident two T-55Zs on a training exercise near Bremin, South Ailier were ambushed by several insurgents with anti-tank missiles. One tank was destroyed, killing three crewmen (see right for picture by local journalist).

The deteriorating security situation is thought to have caused tensions in the Triumvirate. Captain Clone has told The Friar to solve the problem or he will take charge of Cloneworld security. That prompted Benito to say that the terms of the Triumvirate must not be changed without his permission.

SOT strike again

The Sword Of Truth have struck again this time shooting down a HCSAF transport airliner taking off from Ladose AFB in eastern Ailier. The C-491 STOL airlifter had just taken off when it was struck by machine gun fire. It crashed beside the runway. Aboard were 27 HCSAF personnel, 5 were killed and the rest suffered a variety of injuries, some life threatening.

This photo was taken by the station CCTV after the crash.

Velocity VS details, upgrade, extra ship

The fourth Velocity class destroyer is now nearing completion, it will be the first of the improved VS specification with a higher performance and improved systems and equipment. 2204 Progress is due to enter service later this year. The Velocity VS will have a 30 minute dash speed of 960c and a 900c cruise. They will be able to carry Z cannons in an attachable operations pack.

The DDS have announced that the first three ships will be upgraded to VS standard in a two-phase programme. Starting later this year all three ships will undergo Phase 1 of Velocity Legacy VS Upgrade (VLVSU) which is a three day operation to replace software and some equipment. Later on VLVSU Phase 2 will include a new engine and other equipment. This may take place next year.

The DDS are trying to speed up production as the small production line can only produce one ship at a time (which takes around ten months). Finally an eighth example has been ordered, it is thought to will be the last example of the class.

Characters of the week : SS Traffic Wardens

SS Legionaries Mercedes and Audi are otherwise known as the SS Traffic Wardens. A couple of years ago the SS were given traffic policing as part of their portfolio, as you can imagine this really appealed to the various fascists, perverts and fascist perverts who fill the ranks of the SS who took to this new role with zeal... But Mercedes and Audi have taken that zeal to another level.

They got into trouble a couple of years ago by their blatant interfering in order to ensnare more traffic violators. In one example a Dino was running to his car to get there before the parking meter expired. Mercedes tripped the Dino up so he was too late. In another incident a car was parked a few centimeters before double yellow lines started. Audi used a powerful magnet to pull the car onto the yellow lines. They got into trouble with their C.O. but managed to avoid being kicked out of the SS after they discovered their C.O. was a frequent visitor to a brothel...

A couple of years later the boys are back. This time they have made history by fitting a cloaking device to a speed camera. But as not enough drivers were over the limit they spread washing up liquid on the road to speed the cars up. Unfortunately this resulted in a twenty car pileup. The boys have decided to lay low for awhile.

Final Cuba class withdrawn

The final example of the Cuba class transport has been withdrawn from service bringing to an end the career of the DDS' first generation large transport. The ageing ships have proved troublesome over the last couple of years and are obsolete especially compared to the Provider class. The ships have been sold to a commercial spaceline.

The last ship 7104 Grenada was withdrawn when it returned to Solaris after a transport run from Rathun's World following a short ceremony. The other two surviving ships were withdrawn earlier this year.

Two Quasar transferred to Raegris, new frigate construction begins

A while ago the Raegris bought six Quasar cruisers off the DDS and it has formed the key part of their fleet (called the Uhm' Waa Battlecruiser). Two more Quasars were sold to the Raegris earlier this year. Following refurbishment and localisation these 2 ships have now joined the Raegris fleet (though not currently operational). The two ships have received some updates to tactical and defensive systems using Quasar ILU technology. Its thought the six earlier Uhm'Waa will also receive these updates.

The Raegris have also ordered eight frigates based on the Terran Sea Block 3 design. Construction has begun of the first ship (which will be built alongside DDS Terran Seas). The frigate, to be called He'Taka, have a number of differences from DDS frigates being slightly larger to allow for extra equipment. The first He'Taka should be completed by the end of the year.

Postcard from Windscorpion

Some have asked where Windy has been lately, well he has been taking a well deserved break from killing and war at the Butlins in Minehead. Here, in his own words, is a report of his vacation.

Hello young men, and young women too of course. Don't forget the words of Sappho. Well i have had a very enjoyable time at the holiday camp. I love camps. I remember when i was younger i often had a great time camping. With fellow young men enjoying the frugal, disciplined yet fulfilling life under canvas...

So what did i do here? Mostly i was relaxing with some young chums i met here. Listening to Erasure and the PSB while having a very enjoyable massage. Of course we also did some physical activities. Potholing for example. I am very keen on getting into dark holes. There was also some riding. There is nothing better than a vigorous young steed between your thighs...

So refreshed i return to DDS duties. I believe some of the young men have become slack in my absense. Undisciplined. I shall have to come down hard on them...

COCP West Tower collapses

The West Tower of the Castle Of Controlling Power has partially collapsed (under control conditions) following damaged caused by the suicide air attack yesterday. The entire structure is thought to be unstable and further collapses may occur. The Friar has moved his office to HCS GHQ for the time being.

The HCS have said that the body of the pilot who should have been flying the cargoliner has been discovered near to the base. He was killed by a Sword Of Truth terrorist and replaced. The Friar has announced a 1 million zark reward for information leading to the capture of the leaders of the Sword Of Truth and smaller rewards for more minor members of the terrorist organisation.

HCS Intel : The HCS after the Benito war

This time, Dr Forbidden, looks at the HCS in the aftermath of the Benito war.

Although its hard to get the full facts because of the paranoid security and secretcy of the HCS its thought that around 47 warships were destroyed in the battle between the Loyalist HCS and Benito's Eye-HCS, including 4 precious Soulaki battlecruisers. In the land battle on Austini around 20,000 men on both sides were killed and around double that wounded.

So how will the HCS change now there is an (uneasy in some areas) peace? With the HCS split into 3 will the HCSes begin to divulge in equipment and doctrine? It would be a bad idea if they did, as costs would rise. However it may be very difficult to stop the HCSes divulging from each other. Captain Clone and Benito will both want to make their marks on their forces. The Friar's HCS (basically Cloneworld's security forces and the old HCS Reserve) will also change as it's role will become very security and law enforcement focussed.

Indeed there is a change already. Of the new Tapirs ordered to replace battle losses Captain Clone's HCS (HCS-W) wants an interior NBC positive pressure slightly higher than Benito's HCS-E. A minor change for now but a sign of things to come. Wheras it may be some time before the two armies have different major types its likely that sub varients specific to the two sides will come.

Competition and the desire to be different will also drive this change. Its thought HCS-E wants a totally different radio system to stop HCS-W from being able to monitor it's communications. HCS-W has already changed it's encryption keys.

What war are these two armies preparing for? Could it be against each other? We'll have to keep watching.

The Friar announces crackdown

In the wake of the devastating suicide attack on the COCP (which the Sword of Truth has now admitted responsibility for), The Friar has announced a raft of measures designed to combat the terrorist threat including a 1 km exclusion zone to all non-military (and civilian contractors to the military) around all military bases in Ailier, tougher sentences against Oojok believers and the installation of extra SAM systems and AA guns around key military installations. The exclusion zone around HCS GHQ has been set at 5km. All Gale IRBM silos have also had their security increased after fears the terrorists may try to launch a nuclear strike.

Castle Of Controlling Power hit by jet

The Castle Of Controlling Power, former seat of power of Oojok and now the official residence of The Friar has been badly damaged after being hit by a HCSAF cargolifter. The C-440 took off from the nearby Central AFB and soon after ploughed into COCP's South Tower, demolishing it. Its thought a member of The Sword Of Truth was aboard and seized control of the aircraft after take-off.

The Friar was unhurt by the attack but has now been taken to a secret secure location. As South Tower collapsed three of the other five towers were also damaged and its possible the structure is now insecure.

Character of the week : Caratore

Caratore is one of the new generation of DDS captains, the young bucks whom Windy is grooming (no not in that way) to take the DDS onwards once he becomes too old and fat to get it up anymore. Caratore excels as a ship captain and has already proven himself when he successfully led a mission to stop Zone hijackers of a spaceliner. With this proven track record and the fact he gives 110% Caratore is destined for bigger things.

Caratore's past contains no mystery. He has no bizarre sexual habits, he doesn't like S&M or eating schoolgirl faeces. He has committed no crimes and his family isn't notorious for sexual depravity or sin. All in all its a mystery how he got into the DDS! He says he has no vices and is only addicted to success.

Quarz the hero?

The DDS is in shock after a ship commanded by Quarz managed to capture a notorious Utrek war criminal. The Pentekonter class patrol boat was on an unspecified mission along the DDS-Utrek border when it encountered a Molentic Tuul cruiser just the other side of the border under the command of a Utrek Colonel who was thought to be responsible for the murder of dozens of DDS prisoners during the DDS-Utrek War of 2101.

Using a decoy drone the DDS managed to teleport the Colonel off his ship and into custody, the Utrek ship threatened to get him back but did not cross the border as they would have probably resulted in war. Although some have said the mission was due to Delicate Flower's leadership and Quarz spent the mission cowering in the toilet Delicate Flower said that it was all due to Quarz and that he was "All man!"

DDS to offer commercial spacecraft?

Janes DDS Analysis is reporting that the DDS are looking into moving into the commercial spacecraft sector in partnership with an existing commercial builder. Its thought the DDS are going to sell a civil version of the Provider transport ship. This would help solve a problem the DDS have with the Provider and other SUP based types. The SUP production line at Solaris is larger than the fitting out line (for Providers and other SUP based types) at Proxima 5 and a backlog of SUP skeletons is building up. These skeletons are the backbone of the ship and are capable of operation (a pressurised control pod is fitted to them and they travel themselves from Solaris to Proxima).

The DDS are looking to subcontract the completion of a civil Provider to Consolidated Spacecraft (though Boeing-Avery has also been mentioned) using surplus SUP skeletons. This surplus is building up and the DDS are keen to gain a new revenue stream. Cargolux Space have already asked the DDS for the price of a civil Provider.

Civil Providers would be powered by an existing civil powerplant (and thus have a lower performance) as the engines used by SUP include some secret military components.

Character of the week : Holisai

"Her indoors" as Ronald calls her, Empress Holisai is Ronald's wife. She is the Royal Matriarch, the mother of Smellyson, Stinkyson, Ronaldson and Crystal Iguana of course. Shes also a right battleaxe. Ronald's relationship with his wife is 98% fear and 2% utter terror.

They have been together for a long time though, but Ronald's military service and later Emperorship means that he spends a lot of the time away from her. Oh woe, he is heard to have said. Her role in the empire is often overlooked, she is the driver of many social programmes. As she said, the boys are too busy with their stupid toys and games (i.e. war) to bother with the important stuff in life.

Its rumoured she is trying for a 5th child.

UV102 : Wanted For Oppression

Brace yourself for the latest barbed wire jockstrap wearing episode of bollock tearing stories! In "I Am Hardcore" El Diablo and Razorback uncover the truth behind the alledged massacre. Our recruits begin their space warfare training in "Into Space". In a story banned in every country in the world, except Liechtenstein, "Tic Toc" sees a new terror unleashed on the streets.

Von Kane, the Nazi loser, is lured into a HCS trap in "Nazis In Space" like the big ponce he is. Finally in "Jihad : Holy War" the fightback against the Triumvirate begins...

Its available in all Birmingham school tuck shops. Stay tuned for UV103 Violent Intent next month.

"The Sword Of Truth" claims responsibility for attacks

A previously unknown group calling itself The Sword Of Truth has claimed responsibility for a series of terrorist attacks across Cloneworld. The group said that they would continue the attacks until the "land is stained red with the blood of every infidel". They also said that they would "crush the secular forces of the Triumvirate" in a statement issued to a newspaper.

This ties in with theories by DDS analysts that the attacks were made by ex-RP personnel. The attacks have continued after the initial wave though there was a short lull as a HCS security crackdown took place. A HCS base south of Ailier City was attacked by mortar bombs killing 2 soldiers and a civilian worker. A HCS computer centre in Micom has also been attacked by a computer virus porporting to have been written by the Cyber Swordsmen Of Truth.

Rhombus class news

The Rhombus class is a rebuild of 6 Isometric frigates into long-range patrol frigates. These will largely replace the Solaris II on long-range missions at the edge of DDS space. The first rebuild will start early in 2107, the DDS has allocated the 6 ships from the Isometric fleet which has now been reduced to 22 hulls. These 6 ships are officially listed as unavailable though actually half of them are currently on patrols!

More details of Intruder-E emerge

DDS sub-contractor Consolidated Spacecraft have announced more details of the export version of the HCS Intruder landing ship, which now looks set for an order from the DDS. They said that the ship would use a downrated version of the Hitachi HS-740 power unit that has been used in SUP ships like the Provider and Extender transports. Defense systems would also be based on that used on SUP ships. The common parts and expertise needed to maintain the Intruder-E is another cost benefit a spokesman said.

Call for DDS "Space Taxis"

General Lloyd, the head of the DDS Training & Support Fleet, has called for the DDS to purchase a number of ships as "space taxis". He said this after reports of two training missions having to be cancelled because the StarSystem frigates which were to be used where not available. 9102T Pyris was on an emergency transport mission taking medical supplies to Saeou where there has been an outbreak of Saeouan Flu. 9105T Centaurus has apparently been commandeered by a UNP Admiral to transport him from Rathun's World to Proxima 7.

Lloyd said that the DDS needed a few ships for one-off missions like this so the training fleet can be kept for it's primary role. General Eton of the DDS Combat Fleet said that Pentekonter and Terran Sea development would result in some Isometric frigates being surplus. He said that maybe a few of these ships could be made available for these kind of missions.